New ‘Final Fantasy’ not worth it

By Brian Thoman

Nine years ago, Squaresoft made its mark on video game history with the famous role playing game “Final Fantasy VII,” arguably the best video game ever created.

Its memorable characters, excellent plot and its ability to totally immerse a person in another world left most gamers wanting more. Now, nearly a decade later, a new game has come attempting to ride on the coattails of that gaming classic – “Final Fantasy VII: Dirge of Cerberus.” With linear third person shooter game play, this game is a blemish to an otherwise perfect franchise.

Three years after a meteor hits, an underground faction of Shinra, called Deep Ground, pops up and kills thousands in a mass genocide of the “unclean.” It’s up to the undead gunslinger, Vincent Valentine, to pick up his guns again and put an end to the ringleaders of the military coup. The further he delves into the mystery shrouding Deep Ground, the further he pokes into his inexplicable past.

What opens up as an interesting plot line develops into something puzzling and nowhere near what’s expected from Squaresoft. Each advancement the player makes in plot seems less and less connected with the last, making it seem as if the game developers were making up the plot as the game went along.

The game play is not only simple, but boring. Objectives never pose a bigger challenge than obtaining a key card to get to the next section of a one-way level. Controls are so simplistic that Valentine can’t even evade bullets in an effective manner, making him an immobile bullet pincushion rather than some Schwarzenegger-esque hero who can dodge bullets.

This game’s only good feature is the gun customizing option. This allows the gamer to upgrade and piece together the exact weapon he desires to blow apart the endless wave of bad guys Vincent has to fight.

The original Final Fantasy VII was a great game. Playing this terrible spin-off only emphasized this fact.

Instead of buying this monstrosity, “Dirge of Cerberus,” try dusting off the original and playing it again. You’ll be glad you did.