Quick commentary for Sept. 25, 2013

Quick Commentary delivers bits of relevant and important issues on campus or elsewhere. We write it, rate it and stamp it. When something happens that we are not pleased with: DI Denied. When something happens that we like: Alma Approved.

Alma Approved

Pope Francis, yeah, he’s chill with us. Last week, the pope addressed the Church’s obsession with issues such as abortion, homosexuality and contraception. Now, don’t get us wrong, Pope Francis didn’t say the Church would reconsider these doctrines, but rather that they should be treated equally among other sins. Well, this is great news. Because we’re all just walking, breathing sins. Take gluttony, for example: Want a drink? Approved. Want three or eight? Eh, I guess. Want to get drunk? SHAME ON YOU.

Alma Approved & DI Denied

We’re journalists: Free time is just a rumor. But when it comes to a well-intentioned serial killer-gone-rogue-gone-father -gone-whatever-other-plot-twist-that-doesn’t-make-sense-until-the-last-episode, we have to pay attention. The series finale of “Dexter” went a bit like this (SPOILERS): Sister dies, son is left with some rando in Argentina, Dexter died, NO HE’S A LUMBERJACK NOW, the end. Sounds like pretty much every other season finale we’ve seen, but you can’t kill off a serial killer. That would just be counterproductive.

DI Denied

For nearly four days, rampant and consistent gunfire rocked the Westgate Mall in Nairobi, Kenya. Yesterday, Kenyan President Uhuru Kenyatta announced that the Kenyan Defence Force gained back control of the mall after militants with ties to terrorist groups al-Shabab and al-Qaeda held hostages and killed nearly 60 civilians. But the events that unfolded in Kenya very much tie back in to our own country: Kenyan and American forces cooperate to restrict Islamist militants, at least a few American citizens are allegedly tied to the attack and al-Shabab is partly composed of young Somali-Americans from the Midwest. We give our prayers, blessings and wishes to Kenya today.

DI Denied

Senator Ted Cruz, R-Texas, has vowed to speak on behalf of a House-passed resolution aimed at defunding Obamacare — until he’s “no longer able to stand.” Let us clarify, this is not a filibuster, but just the cherry on top of the 42 attempts Republicans have made to repeal Obamacare. Cruz, you aren’t Wendy Davis. Stop trying to make filibuster — or whatever your intentions are — happen. You can’t parallel Davis’ infamous pink kicks. And you certainly chose the easier route: You have the option to sit down, while Davis was reprimanded for having a colleague help her with a back brace. And may we add that you don’t HAVE to do this, unless 30-hours of boredom was your intent in the first place.