Dave’s Hot Chicken is good; nay, great. However, that’s already known. What’s likely not known is the fried chicken mogul is currently piloting a new menu item dubbed Top Loaded fries. The single take away from this review? They’re dangerously good.
According to Chris Zalinski, a member of Dave’s Hot Chicken Chicago franchise team, the item is currently being tested in some Chicagoland areas in addition to Champaign. Supposedly, these fries have been a secret menu item for some time, with some customers doing God-knows-what to specially order them. But fear not: as of about two weeks ago, they’re available on the menu.
Available in large or small, they begin as a base layer of the chain’s standard french fries which are then topped with a decadent layer of cheese. Following that are kale slaw, pickles and Dave’s Sauce. Naturally, they’re finished with chicken bites in any heat level ranging from no spice to Reaper. Note that the latter requires a signed waiver and it does not play games — your mouth will burn for longer than thought possible.
Given the nature of these fries, they’re most definitely a fork meal, unless smothering your hands in hot cheese is a pastime of yours. If it is, hey, that’s your prerogative.
After one unhinges their jaw to fit a bite with all the toppings, they’ll soon realize that God is real, and his name is Dave. Welcome to church — take a seat and grab some wet wipes.
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The pickles truly make the experience, providing a tangy balance to the well-seasoned chicken and flavorful fries. They make a spectacular side, though the large is plenty to serve as a full-fledged meal encompassing all food groups.
For cheese fries lovers, they’re perfect. They’re so much more than bland crinkle-cut fries adorned with a likely fake cheese sauce reminiscent of DIY slime which so many food chains sell. Instead, the loaded fries contain a variety of flavors and textures which leave nothing to be desired.
The customization of heat level makes the fries adaptable for those with even the lowest of spice tolerances. Mild is a safe bet, while hot is the level that truly shines — a universal truth that applies to all the chicken offerings across the board.
Though the original goal of this endeavor was only to try the Top Loaded fries, an unprompted, 2016-esque mukbang à la Trisha Paytas quickly ensued. After eating nearly the whole menu, there were some key takeaways: The tenders and sliders are lovely, and the cauliflower versions should not be squawked at.
This food frenzy came to a rather hasty conclusion, however, the horrifying eldest sibling of the spice hierarchy — Reaper — reared its ugly head in the form of Dave’s Bites.
The preliminary concern comes from the receipt-paper waiver which the employees will ask you to sign, which reads, “You acknowledge that eating the Reaper can cause you harm, including, but not limited to, bodily injury, property damage, emotional distress, or even death.”
At first bite, the heat is not detectable, though the flavor is divine; tastebuds rejoice. But buckle up, because after chewing for not 10 seconds, your mouth will fill with the heat of seven suns. Maybe this isn’t church after all.
Bear in mind: not even a Top Loaded vanilla shake — though delectable — will not save you from the wrath. It is quickly apparent that the only saving grace is the good old waiting game. Cue the aforementioned emotional distress.
For those who don’t have a vendetta against their tongue, do not get anything in the Reaper heat level. For those who want to treat themselves to a chicken christening, order the Top Loaded fries. They do not disappoint, so long as you don’t top them with the Reaper chicken bites.
