“Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.”

“What happened to the doll?”

“It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born: a Festivus for the rest of us!”

Out of this legendary dialogue between “Seinfeld” characters Frank Costanza and Cosmo Kramer was born a tradition of epic proportions: a hoopla including “Feats of Strength,” an “Airing of Grievances” and even the occasional “Festivus Miracle.”

Club Kramerica, a Registered Student Organization commemorating the television show, will host its own Festivus on Thursday, in the Allen Hall Recreation Room at 8 p.m.

“We have everything they did on the show like an aluminum pole with a high strength-to-weight ratio,” said Mike Green, president of Club Kramerica and senior in FAA. “We do the ‘Feats of Strength’ and in the past, we’ve made videos for the ‘Airing of Grievances.'”

Those readers unfamiliar with all the traditional Festivus holiday references, can catch up with a few DVD episodes of the sitcom, or come to the celebration to experience it firsthand. All Club Kramerica events are open to the public, and the celebration could be an ideal outlet for venting the stresses of finals week with some nondenominational holiday cheer.

Festivus also offers a raffle of the latest “Seinfeld” DVD release, the ninth and final season. Competition for the prize may be fierce; more than 1,000 students receive the monthly club newsletter and Club Kramerica’s Facebook group includes a whopping 500 fans of the show. Raffle tickets and admission to Thursday’s Festivus event are free.

There is no need to get down about the slim prospects of winning the raffle. The club also opens its meetings by showing episodes to the general public.

“Watching ‘Seinfeld’ with a bunch of ‘Seinfeld’ fans just enhances the experience. Kind of like a studio audience – when other people are laughing you just laugh more,” said Paul Mlynarczyk, a four-year club member and senior in LAS.

Club Kramerica, however, is not all about recycled reruns.

Kramer’s zany ideas have inspired some civic activity. The Adopt-a-Pathway program was started by Club Kramerica about four years ago, paying homage to “The Pothole” episode.

“Kramer adopted a stretch of highway, mile 114, and he made it his mission to make it clean as a whistle which included blacking out two of the lane lines so it became a two-lane comfort cruise,” said Green, who helps maintain a stretch of Wright Street in the heart of Campustown.

Stale puns aren’t the only inspiration for activity. The group keeps up to date with more recent productions from the “Seinfeld” cast. Jerry Seinfeld’s “Bee Movie” motivated a group excursion to Beverly Cinema in Champaign.

Longtime club member Jordan Bronfeld, a graduate student, said with a grin that the film was “Bee-tastic.”

Bad puns aside, Club Kramerica, “a club about nothing,” offers an alternative way to do “something” for campus improvement.

So perhaps the holidays are best celebrated with the sarcastic comedy of Jerry Seinfeld and a merry round of “Oh Festivus.”