Dear Bravo TV,

Why, oh why do you feel the need to come up with new reality shows that are quite possibly the most absurd things on TV at the moment? Now that “The Real Housewives of Orange County” is over, you have decided to make a “Real Housewives of New York.” Obviously, I will end up watching this, and it will take precious time out of my busy schedule that could be spent accomplishing my life goals. Will I ever learn ballroom dance? Will I ever write a novel? Will I ever learn Italian? Not when you have shows as addicting as “Project Runway.”

My darling Bravo, are you constantly in a state of fear and anxiety that you will go back to your former state of unpopularity? Let’s be honest, no one knew who you were until you put four gay guys on TV to make over clueless straight guys. Apparently, when “Queer Eye” ended, you felt the need to take over the reality TV genre and pound out show after show. This brings us to your newest atrocity, “The Millionaire Matchmaker.”

I think the fact that you chose to air this show about gold diggers and socially inept millionaires shows a lapse in judgment. Unfortunately, from the looks of the new shows that are in the works, or will be out soon, this isn’t merely a momentary lapse.

Plus, don’t you believe that Patti Stanger, a third-generation matchmaker and founder and CEO of Millionaire’s Club, is just a wee bit hypocritical? She says she doesn’t want any gold diggers in her club, and yet many of the women she chooses are in their early 20s. And they are hot. Many are also very intelligent. I’m sorry Bravo, but either your woman is hypocritical or she’s delusional. What young, hot, smart 20-something needs to be set up by a matchmaker? One who’s looking for a sugar daddy, perhaps?

And what is wrong with these millionaires that they have to be set up by a matchmaker? Just watch one episode and you’ll see. Julien is a great example. He is condescending, speaks in a pompous accent, lives with his college roommates in what Patti refers to as the “Pasadena ghetto,” and answers all questions with questions of his own. Or in other words, he’s the man of my dreams. Sadly for him, his date did not work out. I guess to be fair, not every woman is interested in just money.

Yet, when I start to think nice things, I then see something else that makes me want to kick you in the shin, Bravo.

For instance, could you explain to me why the women have to send in professional headshots of themselves, or why the women are lined up all together on display for the one man to pick out his favorite? Women are not objects to be collected along with fast cars and new homes.

I just wish you would refrain from trash like this and stick to great reality TV like “Top Chef.”

I also wish a part of me didn’t want to watch. But I think I’m going to blame you. Oh, and society. It’s not my fault I’m this way.

Xoxo,

Colleen

Colleen Loggins is a junior in Communications who wishes crappy reality TV wouldn’t seduce her on a regular basis.