Letter: Crazy like a fox

By The Daily Illini

So today I was walking on the Quad to my 10 a.m. class, and I realized I was walking just a few feet behind one of our many University crazy homeless guys. He had the look I recognized: tasseled hair, hard and wearied facial features, around four or five teeth, and that unmistakable crazy-guy walk, where every few feet, he’d violently twitch and look over his shoulder.

Since I saw Dave Chappelle at Assembly Hall, I was kind of scared that he was going to face me, crack himself in the balls with a hammer and yell, “I’m on crystal meth!” So even though I wanted to keep my distance, I was in a rush for class, and I started passing him by. As I did, I started to hear random mumblings – which isn’t out of the ordinary – but these mumblings happened to be political, so I took a listen.

“All they need to do is ask him one question, but they’re not going to do it,” he said emboldened. I began to deeply consider what this question could be. I slowly leaned in, staying just far enough away so he couldn’t bite my face, and he said “Ask him, Mr. Bush, could you have prevented 9/11?”

Bingo! Coming at the president with such a tough question, where there basically is no right answer, is a sly and experienced debater’s best tactic. “I have them documents right here in my bag … he could’a stopped it” the homeless guy then said.

Well, that guy was nuts. But his idea was great. If this guy that I really ran into on the Quad was able to come up with this idea, lets all pray that Sen. John Kerry can too.

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Adam White

senior in LAS