The local social scene looks as sweet and impressive as the finest creme brulee, but when you crack the caramelized surface you see the simple, often sad, custard that lies beneath.

Movies where the ugliest, least “befriendable” characters are only a haircut away from being cool and where social awkwardness is endearing have shaped the way many people perceive the rest of the world. That image, more often than not, does not represent the way things work.

When people from across the nation who grew up expecting life after high school to be full of interesting, exciting social encounters go on to college or life, they tend to be disappointed. Many people end up spending long, lonely hours trying to find that social bliss they had always imagined would be waiting for them.

This isn’t entirely personal experience I’m extolling here. There is a little bit, but most of this is the result of research and time well wasted.

I’m looking for a place to live in the spring. My search for the right place for the right price has led me, like so many others, to craigslist.org. For those who don’t know, Craig’s List is a Web site that allows people to post free, anonymous classified advertisements for anything that you wish to obtain or get rid of. It happens to be excellent for apartment hunting, but what I did not know going into it is that the site can be used for people hunting, too.

The personals on Craig’s List contain the normal people-who-need-people ads as well as a “missed encounters” section. This missed encounters section is intended for people who see someone that they think might be interesting (read: hot), but with whom they bumbled their chance to hit on. The idea is that when you get home kicking yourself for not having said “Hello,” you get on Craig’s List and post an ad that says something like:

“You were the cute girl who was eating a burrito at Chipotle this afternoon. You wore a red scarf. If you would like to have a cup of coffee sometime, send me an e-mail.”

As some posters have pointed out, there would be no need for this section if people would have the guts to say something rather than let it become a missed connection. Still, that section of Craig’s List gets visited by a half dozen posters looking for The One That Got Away, and untold hordes of people looking to see if someone had, perhaps, thought they looked interesting.

Of course, Craig’s List has normal Internet dating-type ads, too, the likes of which have almost gained societal acceptance. At least big name sites like eHarmony.com and Match.com have become alternatives to meeting people that might still make your parents cry a little at night, but won’t get you ostracized by your friends.

Walking to class this week, you may have noticed R.Y.’s self-published advertisement soliciting potential friends, possibly more. Complete with little tear-off tags with his e-mail address, these fliers were hung in at least two locations across campus.

While I admire the approach for being cheaper (in dollars, not dignity) and more eye-catching than a normal print ad, I can’t help but sense the loneliness and isolation that R.Y. must feel.

Reasonably, while he is likely to get better results asking 20 random women to coffee than he is with a passive flier on a cold light pole, it would also yield more direct rejection.

Craig’s List and homemade fliers are just a few illustrative examples of the lengths that people will go to in order to find someone to share anything from a cup of coffee to a couple of years with.

I don’t look down on it, myself. It was just shocking to me that so many people are on their computers putting out some kind of effort to meet someone, each feeling like everyone else is out on Green Street or at a theatre having a good time while they are sitting at home, bored.

And who knows, maybe it works. It hasn’t been my experience so (Isn’t that right, Jenny?), but it might be worth a shot.

If you take nothing else away from this column, take this: There is always someone else, probably on Craig’s List, who would rather not drink alone, too.