About a week ago, ten of us girls gathered in our sorority house around the TV. We were watching intently, shushing anybody who walked by and squealing over what was happening on the screen.

TLC recently aired Jill Duggar’s wedding on a “19 Kids and Counting” special episode.

Yes, I will admit it: I love “19 Kids and Counting.” I have been following the family’s story for years, and it is a guilty pleasure of mine. The show is not only entertaining but also has taught me some valuable life lessons about relationships and love.

For those who have not seen “19 Kids and Counting,” TLC follows married couple Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar and their 19 children through their daily lives. Due to strict religious convictions, the family adheres to many unconventional rules and behaviors. All of their children are homeschooled, the girls may not wear pants and they have very strict Bible time each and every day.

However, there is one main aspect of the Duggars’ lifestyle that has grabbed audience’s attention: the Duggars’ practice of courtship. 

Courtship, compared to dating as we know it, usually involves much more family involvement in the couple’s relationship, and there is typically a greater probability of any relationship ending in marriage.

In the Duggars’ case, courtship rules include no physical or sexual contact except “side hugs” before engagement, hand holding is acceptable after engagement and the couple will save their first kiss for their wedding. Also, chaperones, which are usually younger siblings, must accompany the couples on all dates prior to marriage.  

Before you stop reading and say these people are crazy, hear me out when I say that I believe that we all can learn something from the way the Duggars view relationships and love.

I do not agree with their strict rules, and I simply cannot imagine having my siblings come on every single date with me or not being able to kiss, or even “front hug,” someone I am in a relationship with. But I can kind of see why the Duggars do it.

Taking away the physical side of being with someone, the Duggars claim that they are truly putting love and getting to know the person organically first.

In today’s culture, sex is emphasized way too much and, often, people have sex with each other before even learning about each other. We see it every day on campus. Boy meets girl at bar, boy takes girl home, and hooking up usually proceeds. If one is looking for a lasting relationship, this isn’t the best way to get one. 

By taking away those temptations, like the Duggars have, people can better get to know each other. I am not saying that some people do not get to know each other after hooking up, but a situation like the Duggars fully encourages it because there are not distractions.

The couples on this show conduct themselves in a very chivalrous manner, share deep values and exhibit lots of self-control. I believe all of these qualities are what dating couples today need to exemplify.

If we take a step back and look past all of the extreme behaviors and rules that the Duggars adhere to, we can see the value they place on love and family. How can we argue that this is wrong, even if we don’t agree with how they express their values?

Healthy relationships encompass more than just the physical aspects; it is imperative to have strong family and moral ties to unite you and your partner.

While the Duggars may get a lot of comments about their lifestyle choices, I believe that it is admirable what they are able to teach their children.

I do not plan on listening to their courtship rules anytime soon, and I will not be confined to “side hugs,” but I can appreciate the theory behind their practice.

If we look at the deeper meaning behind the Duggar’s ways, I believe we all have something to learn from them.

Rebecca is a senior in LAS. She can be reached at [email protected].