To thy happy children (of the present),

Winter is in full effect. While days might be getting longer – and that is certainly a good thing – even some of our brightest students on this blessed campus turn a blind eye to a very real problem: proper attire when exposed to the elements.

This is a campus-wide issue that can no longer be ignored. There is absolutely no rational reason to wear basketball shorts in the winter; it doesn’t matter if you’re en route to the ARC or CRCE to work out, just put some sweatpants over them for Alma’s sake. Alma does not buy the bull crap about these students “not feeling the cold” in their legs — everyone gets cold!

And to those who wear a jean jacket and a T-shirt and call it a day: Are you ok? A hoodie, windbreaker or worst of all, a lot of alcohol, doesn’t cut it during these months. It’s extremely easy to put on a winter jacket; plus, oversized parkas and coats are in. The jacket doesn’t have to be high-end, just one that keeps you warm.

If putting on a coat is straightforward, then zipping that coat should be even easier. Yet, another weird tendency some of us adopt is to not zip up our jackets and coats no matter the circumstance. A short walk down Green Street is more than enough time to see numerous students walking with their coat zippers unzipped. Students are essentially letting all the cold and windchill directly in by choosing to not zip up. I don’t know about you, but Alma definitely prefers being warm over a weird flex that wasn’t really even OK to begin with.

Please remember that, while we don’t have loads of fur, we are capable of layering during the cold months. A winter jacket does keep you warm, but taking the extra step and wearing a T-shirt or two under a sweater can work wonders. Flannels? Warm and stylish. Long wool socks? Keeps the moisture out and your toes happy. The colder it is, the more options you have for layering clothing — this makes it easier to stay toasty even when one walks through no man’s land: the sidewalks between HERE and 309 (Curse that wind tunnel!).

And of course, investing in nice winter boots does wonders. It might be ok to wear those checkered Vans or Sperry Topsiders when snow isn’t as abundant, but one good look outside a window begs for something much warmer.

Winning wintertime isn’t a matter of fashion, not caring enough or simply “looking cool.” It’s cold as heck, so students might as well just follow what their parents ingrained in their heads so long ago: “It’s cold sweetie, wear a jacket!”

Love, Alma