Mountain men from West Virginia claim to have been abducted by aliens. A highlander documented capturing a leprechaun and followed him to his pot of gold. Well I swear to you, cross my heart and hope to die, I actually know a White Sox fan.

I’m not talking about this weird brood that has been crawling out of the woodwork with newly purchased merchandise, I am talking about a real, live, loyal Chicago White Sox fan. Around her circle of friends she is known as Olga, to me she is one of the few people I will accept White Sox hype from. The sport gods look down on her fondly as she enjoys a victory beverage.

Coming into the Midwest baseball scene was a brand new experience for me, but I learn quickly. Cubs fans are great and love their party, Cardinals fans are a raucous and plentiful group and White Sox fans are either invisible or mute.

Granted, when a team starts to perform well a lot of closet fans will whole-heartedly jump on the bandwagon. But what’s going on now is ridiculous to the point of laughter; everywhere you turn people are shouting, “Go Sox!” If you are a bona-fide White Sox fan beyond a reasonable doubt, then cheers. The White Sox, who are often overshadowed by their more popular and cute, cross-town neighbor, are finally getting their time to shine, but it’s annoying to the point of no return for everyone but the fans hitched to the White Sox express.

In no other large metropolitan area does the fan base of the overshadowed team go from zero interest to addict. In Los Angeles, the Angels fight the Dodgers’ presence and set attendance records. In New York, the Mets fight the Yankees and you can’t cross a street without seeing an orange and blue jersey. In Chicago, the White Sox had the best record in the American League and couldn’t sell out their stadium.

The White Sox influx angers the average fan because of the casual bandwagon jumpers’ fake arrogance. It infuriates Cubs fans because they are not used to playing second fiddle, but most of all it should drive “real” White Sox fans bananas.

(Right now, be honest with yourself about whether you are a true fan!)

If you are, then this is your time. You watched Cubs fans celebrate together during their magical run two years ago. It’s your turn, and instead you have to watch all the chameleons.

I would love to see a team from near my college do well, but instead I don’t want the White Sox express to continue to put my image of sports fans in peril.

Congratulations on getting by the defending World Champions. If you watched the White Sox last year then pat yourself on the back. If you confidentially bought a White Sox hat and ran it through the washer to get an aged look, then prepare to walk the plank. The combined forces of all true fans will be strong enough to point that proverbial sword at you and force you into Davy Jones’ locker.