Twenty-eight years ago, Bruce Weber’s entrance into collegiate coaching was marked by tragedy. He had just been offered a graduate assistant position with future mentor Gene Keady at Western Kentucky. He was ready to move beyond assisting successful Milwaukee coaches with their summer camps and was ready to pursue becoming a college coach.

The phone call Keady placed changed Weber’s life, he says. Just as quickly as Weber was offered the position, he, along with his mother, father, brother and future wife, Megan, loaded two cars and traveled to his new destination.

But in the early hours of the morning, while the Weber family was staying at a motel, they received a call telling them that Carrie, Bruce’s younger sister by 13 months, had been killed in a car accident in Milwaukee.

The same feelings Weber experienced on that day came rushing back when he received the call early Tuesday morning that Jamar Smith and Brian Carlwell had been involved in a one-car accident. Both suffered severe concussions after the 1996 Lexus that Smith was driving crossed the center line and struck a tree near the 2000 block of South First Street.

“Brian was listed in critical, which everyone knows,” Weber said. “(And when) you’re listed critical, that word itself scares you.”

In the aftermath of the accident and the days following, the stress and unanswered questions have been taking a toll on those associated with the Illinois basketball program. No one, though, has experienced the same difficulty that Weber has. The accident involving Smith and Carlwell triggered memories of the one that took his sister’s life. Carrie Weber was a senior at the University of Milwaukee-Wisconsin, working as a waitress when a Marquette University basketball player picked her up at the end of work and offered to drive her home.

A pickup truck, going about 50 miles an hour down a side street, broadsided the car on Carrie’s side.

“I have flashes of that night and the nightmares, the phone calls and the screams and the cries,” Weber said. “And the other night was very similar.

“But this time we have two guys that are alive, so we have a lot to be thankful for. I never got to see my sister again.”

Weber said he acknowledges that everyone makes mistakes. While Illinois’ situation has been tough, he has told the Illini that a number of positives can come out of the recent events. Although Smith faces scrutiny for the actions he took following the wreck, Weber insists he will not turn his back on Smith. He said he must look out for Smith’s mental well-being, along with everything else that is “on his table.” It has not been determined whether Smith was under the influence of drugs or alcohol at the time of the accident.

“It’s just like your child,” Weber said. “You have to make sure you open the door for them and welcome them with open arms and help them learn about life and life lessons.”

During the course of the season, the Illini have continuously fought through life lessons. First came the DUI arrest and four-game suspension for senior Rich McBride, someone who was expected to lend his leadership to a young Illini team.

A bizarre string of injuries to Chester Frazier, Brian Randle, Warren Carter, Smith and Shaun Pruitt followed. Only Trent Meacham and Calvin Brock have played significant minutes without getting injured. But none of those have hit with the impact that the Carwell/Smith incident did.

Carlwell, a freshman center, sat at the end of the Illini bench on Sunday, per Weber’s request, during Illinois’ 48-37 win against Northwestern. He moved slowly, needed the help of his parents to sit down and looked dazed throughout the game, but the sell-out Assembly Hall crowd was appreciative of his presence.

“He wanted to be there and he wanted to be there for our team,” Weber said.

Doctors are positive that Carwell’s injuries are not career-ending, Weber said. Right now, though, Weber said Carlwell must take things in stride and take baby steps. That piece of advice holds true for the entire Illini team, a squad that hasn’t been able to catch its breath throughout the season, and also for its coach, who with this past week’s events has had to be reminded of the call he received regarding his sister’s death 28 years earlier.

“They have to stay together as a team,” said former Illini Luther Head. “They can’t let what they hear in the papers, or what they hear outside of the team let that break them up.”