What the world needs is more pants. In my opinion, you can never have too many pants, because they’re hands-down the most stylish and innovative inventions to date.

So, without further ado, I’ll introduce you to the most life-changing product that you never knew existed: Sauna Pants. You guessed it, a sauna in your pants. The name says it all.

To fully conceptualize my enthusiasm for these pants, I’ll give you a short autobiography. For those who knew me in high school, you may recall that I tried to sell many of you inflatable pants. (Explanation: This was for a very Billy Mays-esque speech about infomercials that I gave as part of speech team.) Sadly, this product does not actually exist, but I’ll still accept those two payments of $39.95 from those who would still like to take me up on the offer.

The main point I tried to make with these fictional inflatable trousers was the sheer absurdity of the nature of infomercial products, even something as outrageous as inflatable pants. Imagine my surprise when I discovered a pants-related product along the same ridiculous lines. Believe me — I’m highly considering calling the toll-free number to buy a pair (they’re on sale for $36.75 on Amazon, plus free shipping!).

Sauna Pants are bright orange and feature a wraparound style, a handy heat adjustment dial and even a place to store all that dignity you’ll lose while you wear them. Convenient!

The goal of this product is to bring the sauna to you — you’ll avoid those awkward communal sauna rooms with the company of people you don’t know and the questionable sanity of a public space. Instead of going to so much trouble to get a relaxing sauna experience, all you need to do is simply slip on these pants (really, they’re more like shorts) and read a book, watch TV or even walk around in public, if you really feel like letting loose.

Plus, the Sauna Pants website insists that Sauna Pants wearers will “shed that extra water weight.” Sauna Pants have a heating pad within them, so they are literally hot pants. So if you like it when your regular trousers make you perspire on hot days, you’ll love it when these warming pants will make you sweat even more in any weather.

I may jest, but don’t confuse my mockery and skepticism for disapproval. On the contrary, I think these pants are fabulous. They shouldn’t listen to what all the critics are saying about them because they’re unique in their own way. These pants have the audacity to stand in their own field, to create their own category of questionable weight loss products, and to do it with style.

Speaking of critics, there are plenty of them.

Some Amazon Sauna Pants users have found that they do not, in fact, make you sweat; they just make you uncomfortably warm. Others complain that the sizing was all wrong, and still others are baffled as to how this product even made it to the market.

Still, I haven’t tried them, so I can’t say much from a personal perspective. If nothing else, watch the video of the compelling infomercial and judge for yourself. If that enthusiastic announcer doesn’t rope you in, I don’t know what will.

There you have it, folks. This has been my pitch for the mighty Sauna Pants. If you find yourself laughing, then they have served as a lighthearted break from your everyday life. If you find yourself ordering several pairs of them online, then I have done my job well.