Editor’s note: These are the 32 movies selected for the pool of #MarchMovieMadness. A round will be revealed every business day for the next week. Fill out a bracket yourself and follow along and vote for your first-round picks on our Facebook page.
March Movie Madness isn’t your regular bracket. Words can’t even begin to explain Selection Sunday. Yes, that’s a cliche, but I’m finally in the position where I get to vent my feelings about a sporting event. So let the overused cliches begin.
It wasn’t easy, but we fought it out until the end. Every one of these contenders has potential, possibility and motivational speeches. Every movie gave it 110 percent, but some, they just wanted it more. All we can do is take this one round at a time. And so we begin with Selection Sunday.
The scene begins at Legends, with three individuals hidden in a corner booth amidst scores of beer-guzzling Blackhawks fans. We were at Legends because we work for The Daily Illini and that’s where we go. We were hungover because we are college students, it was Unofficial weekend and we are journalists. We were on a time crunch for reasons previously mentioned. If you need anything else spelled out for you, hit up my pager.
The selection committee consisted of three of the most qualified people on The Daily Illini sports staff: myself — graduate student, genius and 22-year-old heartthrob; esteemed sports editor and token white male Jeff Kirshman; and the biggest movie nerd who goes to this school, Editor-in-Chief Samantha Kiesel. We were chosen based on seniority, knowledge and good looks.
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You won’t even begin to believe the drama, the death threats and the yelling that went on. This is why we were at a bar. It ain’t easy, determining a field of the top-32 sports movies of all time.
(Disclaimer: This was an impossibly subjective undertaking in which there was no one true right answer. Make your own bracket if you’d like, vote in our Facebook poll, comment and complain — or sing our praises. Bring it on.)
This bracket was chosen through intense methodology, formulated point selection and standards stricter than a military regime. OK, that’s a load of rubbish. But we did have standards. It had to be a feature sports movie, none of that made-for-TV hogwash. Sorry, “Brink.” There were no documentaries — apologies, “30 for 30” and “Hoop Dreams.” And there were no non-sports movies just with sports stars acting — not sorry I’m not sorry, “Kazaam.” #Shaqiswhack
I now feel a huge amount of empathy and solidarity with all of those winners (or losers) who have the privilege (or curse) of being a member of a real selection committee. I hate to be that person but it’s true. “There’s just so many good sports movies out there and they all gave it their all and these are very tough decisions to make. I wish we could have included everyone.”
I fought for a 64-movie pool and I failed. It happens, but there’s no crying in March Movie Madness.
Let’s be real: Some feature presentations don’t deserve to be on here. There’s all those girls pretending to be guys to play a sport — cough, “Juwanna Mann,” “She’s the Man,” cough. There’s all those movies with animals playing sports. Don’t worry we’ll have a later bracket for the “Air Bud” series. And movies that are so bad they’re good, but they’re not really good — “Stick It,” “Blades of Glory,” etc.
For the record, none of my 500 guilty pleasures is in this bracket. Can someone please explain that to me? And no, “Space Jam” is not a guilty pleasure. It’s just proof that I’m a human being with a soul — an instant classic that will stand the test of time.
I would like to apologize to my dad — and every other middle-aged male — for neither version of “The Longest Yard” making it on this bracket. Kids these days just don’t understand what’s important in life.
To the cheerleaders from “Bring It On,” thanks for being here and supporting us and having our back during the entire selection process. Let’s face it, cheerleading is not a sport. and if you want to go anywhere in life, you should come up with some better cheers than ”Brr, it’s cold in here.”
To the boxing movies that didn’t make it, there’s simply too many good movies about boxing. To “Happy Gilmore,” “Caddyshack” is better. To Sandra Bullock and “The Blind Side,” blame Jeff.
If you complain about “Pat and Mike” being in this bracket, you should show some respect for women and watch the freaking movie. If you don’t support “Cool Runnings” and “Sandlot,” you don’t understand our generation. If you haven’t seen any of the No. 1 seeds, go watch them and talk to me later.
If you haven’t seen all 32 movies, congratulations, I guess you have a life. If you think this is obnoxious, we went big or went home. If you don’t care about this, it is what it is. If you have a better bracket idea, we’re taking this one bracket at a time.
Emily is a graduate student. You can reach her at [email protected]. Follow her on Twitter @emilybayci. But she gave up Twitter for Lent, so email her.