About a month ago, the Washington Wizards’ Jason Collins came out as gay, making him the first openly gay, active player in a major sport in the United States. His announcement, met with glorious — and sometimes furious — fanfare remained almost entirely positive. He became a groundbreaker, a revolutionary. But Robbie Rogers, a 26-year-old midfielder for the Los Angeles Galaxy, came out in a personal blog post nearly two months before Collins’ article was published in Sports Illustrated. Rogers should have been hailed as a groundbreaker himself.

Yet he wasn’t.

While some in the U.S. don’t consider soccer one of the “major sports” (certainly not one of the Big Four), but as it is the world’s most popular sport, ignoring Rogers seems like a slight not only against him, but to those who prefer soccer.

But that oversight isn’t even the most startling. Brittney Griner, the Baylor basketball star who became the WNBA’s No. 1 draft pick, also came out before Collins. She plays a major sport by U.S. standards. And Megan Rapinoe, one of many stars on the U.S. women’s national soccer team, came out a few months before any of them. Why are women revolutionaries ignored, especially when it comes to women in sports?

I played soccer from the time I was 5, a career culminating in all-goalkeeping records — men’s or women’s — at my high school and a junior-year fourth place finish in the state of Illinois.

All of my closest friends were male. I preferred jeans and tennis shoes, and T-shirts to skirts and dresses. I liked my hair short, or pulled back. None of that changed the fact that I was attracted to men, yet my actions carried with them the stigmatism of lesbianism.

When women come out in major sports, it doesn’t tend to get much attention, and I think the stereotype of women sports as more masculine certainly has an impact. Women who play sports are seen as more masculine — especially in sports like basketball or soccer — and when they reveal themselves as lesbians, society has a tendency to sigh and say, “We know” or “Well of course. Aren’t you all?” Men don’t seem to experience the same cultural pressure.

Understanding the lesbian as a “masculine” woman or the gay man as a “feminine” man doesn’t allow for appreciation of what homosexuality actually means. It has nothing to do with gender identity, with whether one aligns more closely with the societal ideas of “masculine” or “feminine.” It has only to do with sexual orientation, the gender and sex of the person to which one feels sexual attraction.

Even as the U.S. and the world in general move toward widespread acceptance of the LGBT community, differences in opinion between the lesbian and the gay man still seem to persist. I’m not sure why this is. Perhaps the lesbian seems more dangerous, a greater affront to the “typical family,” or a greater change from what culture expects the woman to do. Perhaps society still wants to fight the strong woman, striving to keep her in the role of passive object, rather than that of an active subject. Perhaps the cultural image of 1950s housewife married to the hard-working office man lasts longer than we’d like to think it does. Regardless of reason, it’s a gap that needs to be closed.

I’m happy Jason Collins came out. And I’m even happy that such a fuss was made about it. I’m glad he can now be publicly who he is privately. I’m glad that Rogers came out, and Griner and Rapinoe. But I think the stories of their exposure, as well as the publicity surrounding those events, tells us more about our culture than their acts of bravery alone.

Sarah is a graduate student. She can be reached at [email protected].