Well it’s been about five weeks since I’ve began writing for the DI. Since my first article I’ve come out blasting about a lot of issues, some that were pretty serious.

However, I think that some of you may be thinking, “Who is this guy? All of a sudden there’s this crazy freshman who thinks he’s hot stuff telling me about everything.”

Most of the people who thought that probably just checked my Facebook profile, and then just shrugged me off as just another know-it-all who thinks he has all the answers.

But I think there are some other things you should know before just putting me aside as a fool.

In 2003-2004 I ran a moderately successful Xanga site, reaching as many as 15 people a day! I also like to pull people who I don’t really know aside and tell them my thoughts on certain issues, just so they think I’m smarter than them.

Obviously I have very little professional background. Still, I don’t think it takes a degree in journalism or poly-sci to know what’s going on and how to interpret things rationally. All it takes is a little background and some good old-fashioned common sense.

Take for example, the upcoming protests against the World Bank and IMF. It is generally known that the World Bank and IMF a) exploit developing countries in order to benefit first-world countries b) help developing countries increase their economic level so that they can industrialize and become productive and c) are locations in GTA 3: San Andreas.

So then it easily follows that the protests against the World Bank and IMF are a) righteous acts that should be supported because they try to point out the hypocrisies in these international organizations b) just a group of pot-smoking hippies who have nothing better to do than protest, play protesting music and write protesting poetry c) stupid. Who wants to hear about my killer spring break? Wooo!

Whoa, wait a second. It looks like more than one analysis came from this event. Apparently, people regard events differently and almost always come up with different conclusions about them. However, there is still some error in that process.

Most people have a preconceived political notion; they are liberal, conservative or apathetic. What makes the analytical process in most people’s minds skewed is that these notions automatically bias whatever information comes their way.

Take this next sentence as an example: George W. Bush announced BLANK at the White House yesterday. Depending on your political background you automatically assume something about that sentence regardless of what the BLANK is. Of course a liberal would already have a negative connotation toward it and a conservative a positive. The apathetic probably wouldn’t have been paying attention, as he was playing with his sweet new PSP.

This makes it terribly difficult to write something that would appeal to everyone, at least something political.

Since there is such a giant rift in this country already, I’ve formed an idea to help bring the country back together. All opinion or editorial writers should always write about something non-political and non-controversial. That way you could walk up to anyone on the street and say, “Hey, did you read Monday’s opinion column on the people hanging out on the Quad when it’s sunny? Yeah, it was totally awesome!”

After the obligatory high five, you would continue your walk through campus a happier person feeling more like a part of the community.

Wait, that doesn’t make sense. The point of the opinions column is to write how you’re feeling about things, regardless of how you’d think people would react, except for of course the silly apathetic guy who doesn’t read the newspaper because he’s too busy hanging out on the Quad when it’s sunny.

So maybe I am a freshman and maybe I don’t really have experience, but I sure as hell get worked up about things and feel the need to express them to a large audience in a hopefully rational way.

Be sure to read next week’s column: “Bunnies at night on the North Quad.”