When I was in grade school I listened to Weird Al Yankovic and Presidents of the United States of America. When I began to understand what real music was, I listened to Led Zeppelin, Eric Clapton and Blues Traveler. I can barely read music and I don’t hold a music degree but I played the oboe in grade school (quite well I think).

However, I think I should know what good music sounds like. And if I don’t, then the American public should. The music that won awards at last weekend’s Grammys is not it.

Congratulations are due to the Dixie Chicks. They took home five Grammys for their 2006 album “Taking the Long Way” that should have been earmarked for any other group than themselves (like the legendary Red Hot Chili Peppers for example.)

After Tipper Gore decided that censorship was needed for current music, I thought that Hollywood would be off the backs of Republicans. Isn’t censorship supposed to be the monstrosity of the Republican Party?

However, the Dixie Chicks have proven that voting members of the entertainment elite have zero interest in music, only in politics.

The Dixie Chicks sold fewer albums last year than The Pussycat Dolls, the soundtrack of “High School Musical” and Nickelback (I didn’t think Chad Kroeger knew how to form complete sentences.)

Evidently, politics can overcome disappointing sales. If you have opinions that the Academy agrees with (See: Green Day’s “American Idiot”) then all the better.

The Dixie Chicks themselves have abandoned country music. They understand that they really aren’t welcome in Nashville anymore after lead singer Natalie Maines remarked at a London concert in 2003 that she was ashamed that President Bush also hailed from the state of Texas.

Yet despite four country artists selling more albums in 2006 than the Dixie Chicks (six additional country albums made the top fifty) they walk away with the country album of the year award not because of their talent, but because of a small group of Academy voters’ displeasures with our President.

They don’t thank their lucky stars, but they should thank their President. After all, without him, they would just be one more country band that Hollywood wouldn’t pay any attention to.

Why are celebrities, whose job it is to sing and to act, so deaf to their own ridiculous political rants?

Listening to actor Tim Robbins articulate his anti-war rhetoric is like listening to President Bush trying read Dr. Seuss aloud. His response to everyone who is supportive of our troops is “Maybe you should enlist.” Go dog go!

Whoopi Goldberg now has her own radio show called “Wake up with Whoopi.” We can now listen to her “feelings” whenever we want. No need for facts or figures now, sugar, you heard it straight from Whoopi’s mouth.

Republicans have their own celebrity supporters, but you don’t see them out on the campaign trails receiving accolades from the party.

Country musician Ricky Skaggs isn’t hosting morning shows or running for office.

He quietly earns money for the party and plays music at events when asked, but Republicans don’t really need the entertainment industry nearly as much as Democrats do. When Republican celebrities do take the spotlight, they tend to do well.

Ronald Reagan and Arnold Schwarzenegger were both elected governor of Hollywood central (California) and then they were re-elected. Why?

Because Republicans don’t welcome celebrities until they’ve proven their ability to speak articulately on issues and represent ideas of the mainstream members of their party.

Even the foolish and mangled Illinois GOP calmed rumors that Ted Nugent might run for Senate in 2004. Although “The Nuge” would have been better than Alan Keyes.

It’s a shame that Hollywood has abandoned rewarding acheivement in music and cinematography in favor of rewarding political rhetoric.

If these are the new requirements for Grammys, then the members of the Academy should look at my opinions, and if they need further proof then I have several perfect scores on the PlayStation version of “American Idol” that I’d like to show them.