While the sexy cat is, and perhaps forever shall be, the little black dress of Halloween apparel, a number of successful and popular Halloween costumes stem from politically, culturally and socially relevant events and public figures. 

Successful comedy relies heavily upon timing and delivery. Thus, the more timely a culturally relevant a costume is, the better; however, one must understand that it’s also possible to be too timely.

I was in Carbondale this past weekend for Southern Illinois University’s “Unofficial Halloween” festivities. As I sat in a local Steak ‘n Shake, indulging in a Guacamole-smothered burger and generally minding my business, two yellow-suited young men appeared behind me. They wore “homemade” Hazmat suits and declared that they were dressed as “EbolaBusters.” 

I’ll be frank and say that I impulsively laughed at this realization — it was a sick joke, sure, but a joke nonetheless.

But as I contemplated the joking notion of “EbolaBusters,” and pictured Bill Murray battling pathogens alongside Zuul and the Stay Puft marshmallow monster, I started to wonder: Just how funny is Ebola?

To many, the appropriateness of a Halloween costume might be considered a gray area — that is, how can there exist a costume that is so universally inappropriate and insensitive that condoning its public display becomes questionable?

While I’m an avid fan of eccentric and daring comedic endeavors, it’s important to remember that what you wear this Halloween can have consequences of varying degrees. 

Without further adieu, I present you with the official Carly Charles compilation of “Too Soon Halloween Costumes: 2014.”

1. Ebola: This one has its merits: It’s economically sound — just tape a Center for Disease Control logo onto 2013’s “Breaking Bad” Walter White costume, and voila. But when you pause and consider exactly what Ebola is — a highly contagious virus that causes fatal hemorrhagic fever, internal and external bleeding and kidney failure — does making a mockery out of this fear inducing, often deadly disease really sound so funny and clever? Should you wish to embody, humorously, a disease this Halloween, but want to put centuries of separation between your costume and its devastating effects, might I suggest the plague of the 14th century. “Boob-onic” Plague works as a “Sexy” substitute, if you happen to roll that way. 

2. Zombie Robin Williams: The beloved Robin Williams suffered a self-induced death just months ago on Aug. 11. The Zombie Williams costume would possibly consist of Williams’ Mrs. Doubtfire attire and a noose. Williams will go down in history as one of America’s most loved comedians; yet, is it appropriate to bring dark humor into his untimely death? Suicide is the 10th most common cause of death in the United States; while “joking” about suicide might bring attention to the issue of mental health, it does so in a way that is cheeky and ignorant. 

3. Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 Passenger: The disappearance of Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 resulted in a costly search effort, and the vanishing of 227 passengers and 12 crew members. What does poking fun at an international disaster say about you? If you’re into aviation, “Snakes on a Plane” might be a more tasteful and humorous alternative. 

4. ISIS executioner: Since August, two Americans have been executed by the militant group. Good luck landing a job should photos of this costume make their way to the Internet (which you know they will). 

5. Couple Costume: Ray Rice and his girlfriend. Whereas the decisions of the National Football League might be laughable at times, Raven’s running back Ray Rice using force against his girlfriend is not. There’s not anything funny about domestic abuse. Consider the notion that while you apply makeup to create the illusion of cuts and bruises, a victim of domestic abuse applies layers of makeup to cover them up. 

Undecided: 

6. Zombie Joan Rivers. Yes, a death caused by surgical complications is no laughing matter. But being sensitive was never one of the late Joan Rivers’ strong suits, so wouldn’t this costume honor her memory? I’m still up in the air about this one. 

So, controversial costumers, before you don your homemade Hazmat suit, I urge you to ask yourselves: Will wearing this seemingly witty, original and possibly insensitive costume inspire lots of people to think, “A**hole?” If this is the case, you might wish to revise your Halloween costume vision before next week.

Carly is a junior in FAA. She can be reached at [email protected].