Growing up, I was very much the kid who was quick to feel left out. I would even cry about being all alone in the back seat of the car. 

I’m happy to say I take joy in my alone time now, as well as socializing, but this wasn’t always the case. I’ve come to think about all this a little differently, particularly in terms of social media.

I haven’t had Instagram or Snapchat downloaded on my phone ever, so I don’t usually notice the lack of it in my life.

Entering college and meeting new people brought the lack of social media to the forefront. Whether it was about forming a group or making a friend, the question would always be, “What’s your Snap?” 

Since I didn’t have the app, people would either dismiss me as a potential contact or, much to the inconvenience of everyone, we’d make a group chat through our phone numbers the old-fashioned way. 

It’s been easy to experience FOMO. I am a fairly social person, and I like to see friends and be around people. These days, with so much of life documented and centered around online presence, I sometimes feel like I’m missing out on something. 

I end up finding out about campus events and big life updates secondarily. Friends get married, and I don’t know until the information finds me by chance through word of mouth — sometimes sooner, sometimes later. 

Keeping in touch is a perfectly valid reason to have social media. I know some people only use one platform to stay in contact with their friends, so I can understand that reasoning. 

Being surrounded by campus life, where RSOs and friend groups alike advertise and share through social media, has even made me seriously consider downloading Instagram. Yet, a nagging feeling inevitably creeps from the recesses of my brain, asking me if I’m prepared to enter that realm. 

I have debated creating an account and simply not following any friends to avoid complicating things. At this point, though, the temptation to connect on social media platforms and the slippery slope of scrolling, managing and fixating that I know I can go down makes me relieved to maintain limits on my exposure. 

I still engage with such platforms by being around people who are on such platforms. Yet, by keeping myself off of them, I don’t give myself the option to get fully sucked in. 

I’m sure it’s doable to navigate the social etiquette side of things, etc. However, I’m unsure if I’m invested enough to tackle the intricacies of Instagram social protocol: all the do’s, don’ts and the repercussions of not observing them properly. 

Of course, I don’t love finding things out late and not being in the constant loop, but I prefer not knowing exactly what I may be missing. Since when do I need to be included in everything anyway? 

It has taken me a long time to accept that, but nowadays my introverted side has no issue doing so. There is bound to be some amount of give and take. I can still read the news through reliable websites and explore RSOs that interest me on campus by attending events like Quad Day or joining groups on Telegram and GroupMe.

Much of it has come down to knowing myself and how I respond to things. Friendships can be tough to navigate, and miscommunication is already too easy. Not to mention, as people post their hangouts and block or follow certain individuals over others, drama can brew.

As much as I am a social person, I don’t like to always be in the thick of things. This came from being around many people. I like my space and find it more peaceful to focus on the various things going on in my life already, rather than adding in an element that I foresee making me discontent.

I know that being plugged in on campus is more likely to make me exhausted and more detached from people — I’d focus on what is happening when I’m not present. What use would it be to change anything? I have been blessed with some wonderful friends, and, in college, I prefer hanging outside the edge of huge social media circles. 

In a very practical sense, I use my phone a fair amount on a daily basis. I have YouTube and Pinterest, and while one may laugh and say that can’t be much to be addicted to, it certainly can. YouTube is a spacious enough rabbit hole, and this Alice really doesn’t need any more digital adventures sucking time out of her day!

Things keep changing, of course, and perhaps one day after I graduate, I will download Instagram. However, I would like to think the factors that determine that decision are ones I clearly see benefit in. I don’t want them to be motivated by the desire not to be the odd one out when I know I’m quite happy being just that.

Zaynab is a senior in LAS.

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