The Daily Illini

Editorial: Keep outsiders out of Unofficial

By The Daily Illini Editorial Board

It’s the tragedy of the commons. When no one has to take full responsibility of a shared resource, the people who use it will act in their own self-interest, destroying the space for their own gain — like the destruction of our atmosphere, our forests and endangered animals.

And this Friday, our beloved bars will face this same destruction.

While we as students of this University may from time to time give in to such destructive tendencies, we at least hold some modicum of responsibility for our campus, as we have to live with the repercussions of those actions.

But the thousands of visitors that will flock to this campus in a drunken, savage stampede? Your friends from other Illinois colleges, your old high school ex-confidants, your ne’er do well acquaintances that only speak to you around this time of year? They don’t care one bit about our campus or our holiday; they only care about our alcohol.

The UIPD told the Daily Illini Editorial Board in a meeting that the majority of tickets, arrests and police action on Unofficial occur in response not to our students, but to overeager visitors.

Unofficial used to be a raucous event, equivalent to a true drunken Irish holiday; crowds would flock to the streets, all but shut down the serendipitously-named Green Street and celebrate in a way that would truly impress our alumni of days past.

As such, The Daily Illini Editorial Board has come to the conclusion that the only way to return Unofficial to its former glory is for all of us to take a stand and tell our friends from other schools to stay away on Unofficial.

“But my friends can handle their alcohol! They won’t wind up a disgusting mess! They’re the exception to the rule!” You may be saying to yourself. But think: At a University where Unofficial basically takes place every Saturday at Block, we hold ourselves to a higher standard of alcohol tolerance and generally smarter and safer consumption practices than your less-knowledgeable friends.

It doesn’t matter, your friend could be rookie of the year, but you don’t take an unseasoned player and put them in the big game against experienced players who have been training for years. And we do train all year for this event, placing an untested pal in this degree of play is foolish.

So this Unofficial, channel the University housing’s policy and keep your friends away. Tell them to Brom-LEAVE, to stay FAR away. Or else our beloved Unofficial will turn out to be another sub-PAR tragedy of the (Ikenberry) commons.

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