Quick Commentary for Sept. 10, 2013

Quick Commentary delivers bits of relevant and important issues on campus or elsewhere. We write it, rate it and stamp it. When something happens that we are not pleased with: DI Denied. When something happens that we like: Alma Approved.

Alma Approved:

Men and women across Washington and Colorado, armed with family-size bags of Cheetos and anything chocolatey and king sized, celebrated the Department of Justice’s decision to allow the two states’ marijuana legalization laws to proceed. Well, the celebration technically started after the 10 minutes it took for residents to realize what had happened, and the additional 10 minutes to stop watching ‘90s Nickelodeon re-runs. Attorney General Eric Holder specified certain instances in which federal prosecutors could intervene — such as drugged driving or distributing to minors — but that’s only if you can make it off the couch first. If Washington and Colorado residents adhere to their respective states’ laws, and the D.O.J. doesn’t have much to say, then what’s the problem? More money for the states? Fewer incarcerations? Oh, the horror!

Alma Approved:

After Secretary of State John Kerry suggested a more diplomatic approach to the Syria conflict, Russia passed the news on to Syria. If we didn’t know any better, we’d think the U.S. is a high school girl, Syria the crush and Russia the middleman. The proposal to place Syria’s chemical weapons under international control is one to seriously consider. It would potentially avoid military intervention, as well as Congress’ and American citizens’ partisanship on the issue. After all, we can’t forget Assad’s lingering words in his interview with Charlie Rose — expect everything.

Alma Approved:

So, Apple is hosting its first event since June on Tuesday. The rumors are as follows: the iPhone 5S made from an “indestructible” alloy (students parting with their fourth iPhone, we’re looking at you), the iPhone 5C that comes in various bright, primary colors (that will get annoying in a day), iOS 7 operating system (see Android operating system) and Apple TV (seriously, anything that’s not Comcast will keep us sane).

Alma Approved:

If any of you didn’t watch “The Roast of James Franco” on Comedy Central this past week then you have awful taste. The jokes: mediocre. James Franco: GORGEOUS. No, seriously. That’s it. He’s gorgeous. The end. Bye. Thank us later.